Thursday, June 18, 2009

All eyes on me.

Yep. I attempted a trip to Wal-mart over lunchtime with 3 whiny children.

Three you ask? I have my two and a little girl I babysit. Ages 6, 3, and almost 2.
Thank God my dear friend, Amy (one of 20 thousand Amy friends), met me there as she had a very pricey prescription to drop off. She had her sweet, lovely 5 month old and I was the one with the 3 whiny children.
I looked like the most WHITE TRASH Mama in all the country today. I became what I have always dreaded. The mother with 3 screaming children in the middle of Wal-Mart. You ask yourself, “Why didn’t she just leave?” No…I don’t just up and leave a place of establishment and let them win. They didn’t want to be there. I didn’t want to be there, but we had to be. So I quickly got the things I needed all the while forgetting the main reason I chose Wal-mart over my trusty grocery store.
Never went back and got them. I couldn’t take it anymore. I truly thought I was losing my mind. I felt impatient (Which is odd for me), embarrassed, and like the laughing stalk of every elderly lady there (whom I pictured were shaking their fingers at me).
I learned a few things on my trip today for future reference as I will be eventually, God willing, have 3 children of my own (but no way in HELL they will be a year apart).

1st mistake: Going to Walmart. Period.

2nd mistake: Going to Walmart over lunch. Hungry kids=impatient kids=mental breakdown of WT mother

3rd mistake: Getting one of those 2 seater carts with the buckles. 2 seats and 3 kids= disaster

4th mistake: Praising my son on how wonderful he has been. Ego boosting=oh that must mean I am in the clear to be naughty!

5th mistake: Letting the almost 2 year old out of the buckle since she was crying SO loudly through the store because I would not hold her while pushing the 2 seater cart which would not turn in any direction I wanted it too.

6th mistake: Going to Wal-mart. Period. Did I mention that already?

So, when I finally made it home, after running through the drive-thru to feed the whiny, hungry kids, I made my final mistake:

I took them to the pool.
What was I thinking???
As Hubby would say, “I would have just put them all in bed.”
I should listen.
I should not try to be WONDER White Trash Mother of the Year (WWTMY).
I really truly thought that eating lunch and time at the pool would allow them to relax and enjoy the crisp water as the temps are up to 88 in these parts.

Nope. Didn’t happen.
Instead I got:

Crying girls & clingy son who kept hanging on me as I had two crying girls who needed held.
My daughter who didn’t listen to her WWTMY who told her not to run and she did. She wiped out and scratched both knees on the concrete.
2 high schoolers came to the rescue with swabs and band aids and a paper to report the incident. Nice. I had to chuckle as my 3 year old, Syd, said, "I need to go to the doctor so she can make it better!"
After snack, I called it quits and we headed home.
It is nap time and I am contemplating the rest of my evening.
Noah and I have cub scouts, where we are making little First Aid kids. This will be a nice break for me.
Truthfully, this was just one bad day. It isn't every day it is like this, so I will remain positive. :)
For tomorrow is Friday!! And I have a day of baking pound cake for Pokeno Night and a cake for Father's Day, making homemade ice cream with the kids, and a new day!


Therese said...

I burst out laughing at your description of WT Mama at Wal-mart. I swore I would never be happens all the time...

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Honey, I've seen the clientele at our WM and I'm sure you looked amazingly together compared.

Staci said...

Hmmmm you are describing me minus one child! hehehe! I'm sure there was worse! TRUST me there ALWAYS is! (usually its me!) lol :)

Sara said...

Hang in there. Tomorrow is a new day!!

Cameron said...

New Day and almost Saturday....your on your way to only two children again. I am sure Sara is loving you to death though.

Staci is right...THERE IS WORSE....we have all witnessed it in Wally World.

Liz said...

I so should not laugh but I have had those days my self. I should blog about our trip home today from 4 days in PA. You would pass along the white trash mom award to me =)

Johnnie Avocado said...

I loved the mistake list....everytime I go to walmart....I go ...why the hell did I come here!

Lisha said...

Thank goodness I am NOT alone!!! But I survived.